WWDC 2013. iOS 7. Meh.

Yeah. I said “meh.”

What’s it to ya?

WWDC 2013 was much ado about nothing.

And the centerpiece of the keynote-that-wasn’t, was unquestionably iOS 7.

While Apple wants us to believe that the latest iteration of its OS is the next best thing to sliced bread, the rest of us know better.

So effing what they’ve adopted a “flatter” look.

Who the hell cares that they’ve changed the appearance of their icons.

Big deal if you’ll be able to flip through your open applications in a vertical Cover Flow fashion.

As much as I’m loathe to admit it, most of these “innovations” already exist on Android.

Earth to Apple: just because you do something doesn’t make it great.

I mean really?

Swipe a tile to the side to get rid of it?

Side reveal to open apps or menus?

New transitions?

Android.

Android.

Android.

If they announced one more Android standard as a new iOS feature, I was going to puke.

Yeah, I’m going in on iOS 7.

But to be frank, the entire WWDC keynote was a snorelax.

It wasn’t as bad as Google’s I/O 13, but it wasn’t much better.

Apple’s presenters actually appeared to be alive.

Beyond that though, the entire keynote was almost indistinguishable from Google’s in its sheer underwhelmingness.

I know, underwhelmingness is not a word.

But how else to describe an event so totally devoid of life and energy?

There was no punch.

No pop.

No pizzaz.

Especially when you start with a massive demo fail, when Anki Drive’s robotic car failed to….drive.

We all had to suffer through Anki founder, Boris Sofman’s plastic grimace smile as he waited impatiently for the program to reboot.

And things just went downhill from there.

Now to hear Apple tell it, WWDC 2013 was a huge success.

They unveiled all sorts of new features and products.

The Mac Pro, new MacBook Air, blah, blah, blah.

Each new reveal was as lackluster as the last.

Oh, and by the way, just because you say “isn’t it beautiful” over and over again, doesn’t make it so.

I, for one, am totally unenthused by iOS7.

But developers get ready, Jony Ives’ technicolor nightmare is upon us.

They recently published guidelines for developing apps consistent with the iOS 7 guidelines.

From here on in, the apps you create have to comport with this new LSD induced design aesthetic.

And all I can say is meh.

Posted with Blogsy

The iPad 2. My “new” favorite device.

Stephen and iPad sitting in a tree, w-o-r-k-i-n-g.

Have you heard?

I’m in love!

No. Not with my wife.

I mean, I’m in love with my wife.

Don’t get me wrong.

She’s a sweet chick that doesn’t get on my nerves too much.

Just kiddin honey. You don’t get on my nerves at all.

The point is, I’m in love but its not the wife.

No. Not the kids.

Love the kids (by default, not design).

But I’m not talking offspring here.

My job? Gimme a break!

Check in with me when I’m clocking seven figures.

For now, negatory.

Alright, last guess.

Wrong!

I do love sex.

But it’s an act, not a thing.

You suck at this.

Remind me never to pick you as a game show partner.

It’s my iPad 2!

I am head over heels in love with it.

I recently got it from wifey for my birthday.

I was, in a word, verklempt.

Why all the emotion?

After all, this is my second iPad.

I had the original for three years.

Mind you, I was pissed when Apple dropped the 2 within months of my copping the 1.

But I wasn’t going for the okey-doke and buying into Apple’s manipulative bait-and-switch (and rape your pockets).

So for three years, I made do with my camera-less, FaceTime deficient, slower iPad.

Don’t get me wrong, we had our run.

But when the 4 was released, followed by the Mini, and talks began about a 5 and a retina display Mini, I realized enough was enough.

I had to step up my game.

Then came the dilemma.

Do I cop the 2, 3, 4 or Mini?

The Mini was out of the question.

I tooled around with it in the office, and it was so not a tablet.

I mean it is a tablet, but its not a tablet.

Knowhatimean?

You’re daft.

Try to keep up with me, please?

Anywho, the debate really centered around the 2, 3 and 4.

Do I just go for it and drop coin for the latest and greatest, the 4 with its retina display, 4G LTE and all the bells and whistles?

Or do I settle for something less bells and whistley from an earlier generation?

The decision was easy.

The 2.

Same (general) features and functionality of the (now defunct) 3 (and 4), less price.

Sure it’s maxed out at 16GB.

And there’s no Siri.

Lower resolution photos and video recording.

But for all intents and purposes, its the same thing.

Truth be told, my love affair with the 2 started the day I beheld it in the wild for the first time.

My man’s girl had one in Miami, during Art Basel.

And before I knew what was happening, I was one of those dorks shooting video with a big ole tablet in my outstretched arms – Frankenstein’s monster-like.

Get it right. Frankenstein was the man, not the monster.

The foolishness of my appearance did little to dampen the unbridled affection I felt – and presently feel – for it.

Even today, well after the novelty has worn off, as I cradle my very own 2 lovingly in my mitts, affection wells in my chest.

Why the love affair, you ask?

Well, nothing in my arsenal impacts my day-to-day productivity more than the iPad.

My iPad helps me get shit done.

Shout out to Moses.

If you’ve every tried to work on your iPhone while out and about, or even on your laptop, you quickly realize there are – limitations.

One’s too small and cramped.

The other’s too big and bulky.

But my iPad is just right.

I power through emails.

Schedule appointments.

Knock out to-do’s.

I’m generally bout-it-bout-it.

Bout-it bout-it=handling one’s business in a professional and thorough manner.

When I’m rocking with my iPad, you might as well give me a cape and call me the Black Superman.

I gets that busy.

So if you see me out and about, fondling or kissing my iPad, and it makes you feel…uncomfortable…

Avert your eyes.

Nothing’s going to stand in the way of my love.

The new Aeropostale app is here! And I’m great.

I’ve been siting on a juicy tidbit of information for a few weeks now.

I wanted to blab about it, but I had to play it close to the vest until it was official.

Today, my client forwarded a link from Mobile Commerce Daily, letting the cat out of the bag, so I guess I can share.

The new Aeropostale app has arrived!

What’s the big deal, you ask?

Well, if you must know, both of the Aeropostale apps described in the Mobile Commerce Daily article are my projects.

So I take great pride in this announcement.

The Aeropostale iPad in-store kiosk, which was developed for their concept store in Roosevelt Field Mall, is special for a number of reasons.

Not the least of which is the fact that it was my project.

Did I say that already?

I kid. I kid.

What makes the iPad app special is the thought that went into it.

Aeropostale wanted to make an interactive tablet app that would simultaneously engage the user with non-shopping related activities, while providing useful information and the ability to initiate and complete purchases (if they so desired).

The features, function, layout and UI were carefully designed to be visually engaging, provide ease of use and ultimately, fun.

With the Aeropostale iPad kiosk, they’ve achieved their desired end.

The center piece of the app is the Music player.

On the Music page, you can browse through the various songs on the playlist, Cover Flow style, and select the song you want to hear next.

Depending upon how many votes a song gets, it gets moved up in the playlist.

The other highlight of the app is the Outfit Builder, which lets users swipe through three carousels, tops, bottoms and accessories, and create an outfit of their own.

Once you’ve created a look to your liking, press the ‘Select This Outfit’ button.

And boom! Your outfit is built.

You can share or buy your outfit right on the spot.

You can even ask an associate to help you find the items you’ve selected while you’re in the store.

Other interesting features include a Video page, Style Guide, Scanner and Shop Online feature, which serves up a tablet optimized version of the Aeropostale site.

Version 2.o of Aeropostale’s iPhone app is also a thing to behold.

And I’m not just saying that because it’s my project.

Did I say that already?

I kid. I kid.

But seriously, their new app is the bees knees as the old timers say.

No seriously.

It’s really cool.

Check it.

Super fly feature numero uno: users can toggle between Aeropostale two brands, Aeropostale and PS, simply by clicking on either logo in the header.

Super fly, right?

So so def feature dos: Girls and Guys carousels on the Shop page let you swipe though all content categories.

So so def, right?

Three times dope feature tres: the Style page lets users browse and play videos and connect with Aeropostale’s Facebook, Twitter, YouTube and Pinterest social media profiles.

Three times dope, right?

In addition to these super fly so so def three times dope features, the app has all your standard features and functions baked in.

To wit: store locator, coupons, scan, search, yada yada yada.

The list of stupendousness goes on and on, but I’d rather not prattle on endlessly about how great the apps I usher to life are.

You can download the app and see for yourself (how great I am).

If you’re a mom of teens/tweens, this app is definitely for you.

Aeropostale makes great, fairly priced stuff and this app makes it über easy to browse and buy on the go.

If you’re a teen/tween yourself, Aeropostale’s app are built with you in mind, so cop that app!

And congratulations on finding your way to my blog…please excuse my often foul mouth.

I can’t legitimately take all the credit though.

I’ve got a talented team of creatives, developers, QA and account managers – who I won’t specifically name here lest they steal my thunder – who helped make this app a success.

Anywho, Aeropostale’s apps have given me a reason to talk about myself.

Thank you Aero!

Note:  I would be remiss if I failed to acknowledge that these apps were made possible through the hard work and dedication of Dianne Ramlochan. I was shamed into adding this footnote.

Jailbreak is here! Jailbreak is here!

After several long months of waiting, there is finally a Jailbreak for iOS 6.

I know most of you are like “so effing what?”

But for the geek technorati, this Jailbreak is a godsend.

In the past, I went through all kinds of conniptions to get my iOS devices jailbroken.

When word of a new jailbreak hit, it was on!

I’d head uptown, snaking my way through side streets and back alleys.

Special knock.

Password.

Think Neo getting a knock on his door in The Matrix.

A few hours of tinkering, backing up, installing and configuring and…Viola!

Jailbroken devices.

And free apps as far as the eye can see.

But that was before Hackulous and the Installous store were unceremoniously shuttered.

What?!

You didn’t know that Installous, the infamous pirate app store, shut down earlier this year?

Well it did.

Leaving many Jailbreak aficionados, like myself, in the dark about the future.

And with no way of getting our grubby hands on cracked and app store rejects.

For months we’ve been wandering an iOS wasteland, waiting for a Jailbreak messiah.

And we’ve been rewarded for our faith and patience.

Enter Evasion.

The Evasion jailbreak tool picks up where Installous left off.

For one, it makes jail breaking your phone a cinch.

I’ve never personally jailbroken my own phone.

Moreover, I never dreamed that I’d be able to jailbreak my own device in a matter of minutes.

It was so simple, that I found myself shell shocked.

I haven’t even visited Cydia to cop any new apps.

Now that’s not to say that I won’t.

I just haven’t yet.

I think the ease with which I was able to bypass Apple’s draconian efforts to bar third party app developers, dulled it’s appeal.

What good is being bad if everyone can do it?

A jailbroken device was a sign of anarchy.

But you’re not an anarchist if your actions are….ordinary.

In any instance, I’m just happy I’ve (once again) wrested control of my device from Apple.

And can trick my iPhone 5 out the way I want.

If you’re interested in joining the 7 million of us who have already tasted freedom, check out Redmondpie.com’s simple instructions for getting your jailbreak on.

Disclaimerm: Jailbreaking allows you to access apps and tools which have not been expressly blessed by Apple (=passed Apple’s vigorous muster). So whenever you install apps onto a jailbroken device, know that you run the risk of fucking some shit up.

The iPad 4 arrives with a whimper. But it’s better than the Mini.

Sometimes Apple really perplexes me.

I’ll tell you why.

Last month, when they announced the iPhone 5, many speculated that Apple would also unveil the iPad Mini.

Others felt that Apple wouldn’t want to upstage the iPhone with the iPad mini.

Ultimately, the iPhone was announced alone.

On Wednesday, last week, however, they announced two new products, the iPad Mini AND the iPad 4.

Few, like myself, even took notice that there was another iPad release.

Hadn’t Apple withheld the release of the iPad Mini to avoid one device stealing the thunder from another?

Why, then would they announce the release the iPad 4 and the iPad Mini on the same date?

It’s not like the iPad 4 isn’t worthy of shine.

It’s got the new lightning connector.

And supposedly it’s fast a hell.

It’s got an A6X processor and doubled the speed of wifi.

There’s also a higher quality FaceTime camera, which means you can see yourself…better?

But as many analysts have noted, it’s just an iterative change.

Well we got both the iPad 4 and Mini in the office yesterday, and the Mini is nothing to write home about.

Side by side comparison. Notice anything different?

I can say this much about it – it’s smaller.

You can fit it comfortably in your hand, like the Galaxy Note.

And it’s extremely light.

Compared to the iPad 4 (which weighs a friggin’ ton) it’s light as a feather.

But that’s about where the benefits end.

The display isn’t retina, and the difference is noticeable.

And everything is smaller.

You would think that looking at websites on the Mini would be akin to viewing on a full-size iPad, but tis not the case.

It’s more like looking at a big iPhone.

The text is too small to be read easily without eye strain, and everything is just…smaller.

The iPad 4, for it’s part is really just a blown out iPad 2.

Like it’s predecessor (the iPad 3), it’s heavy as shit.

This extra weight comes not from the retina display, the new processor or additional antennae.

It’s the battery.

Want all those bells and whistles?

Then hold this fat ass battery.

As far as performance goes, they’re virtually indistinguishable.

Watching videos over wifi, they performed pretty well.

Both loaded quickly and streamed fine.

Field testing the iPad Mini and iPad 4.

►

Folks filed in to take a look at the Mini, and the universal opinion was that it was ‘cute’ and little.

And that may be enough for folks to shell out $329 for the wifi only model.

And the extra weight may not bother folks who are looking to preserve their eyesight and cop the iPad 4.

To be honest, I was underwhelmed by both devices.

For what it’s worth, I’ll pick up an iPad 2 and call it a day.

The iPad Mini is real. And it’s almost here.

iPads back to back.

Today at 10:00 am PST, Apple unveiled the iPad Mini (yes, that’s what they’re calling it).

Once again, Apple failed to send me a press invitation.

Earth to Cupertino – Chukumba’s audience really needs him to be there for a firsthand assessment.

Don’t you know that there are at least six people who rely on these assessments before making purchase decisions?

But, as the bigger person, I won’t hold it against them, and still give you the goods.

We huddled around an iPad 2 in the office to watch the announcement.

Ironic huh? Watching the announcement for the Mini on a 2.

I digress.

Anyway, after going over all of the things they’ve done to improve the current iPad, they flipped an image of the iPad to its back, where stood the new iPad Mini.

It was a thing to behold.

For one, the iPad Mini is dwarfed by the current version.

Indeed, during the presentation, a real iPad Mini was introduced, and it fit in the Tim Cook’s one hand.

My first impression was that it looked like the Galaxy Note.

That can’t be good.

Knee jerk reactions aside, there were a host of features they called out.

Its small. 7.9 inches on the diagonal.

Its thin. About the width of a pencil.

Its as light. They compared it to a pad of paper.

And contrary to my assessment last week, they gave us everything we’ve come to know and love about the iPad in the Mini.

We’ve got both cameras.

Apple even gave us some new shit.

Can you say faster wifi?

All-in-all, it looks like the Mini will be a real coup for Apple.

With the $329 for the wifi only 16Gb version, it’s an easy entry point.

And certainly something to keep folks from flocking to the Kindle Fire HD, the Google Nexus or the Samsung Galaxy Note.

I don’t know about you, but I’m going to get one.

And once I have it, I’ll give you a real assessment.

Not me talking about what they talked about.

So bear with me, while I wait for Apple to send me a version to test.

Don’t hold your breath.

iPad Mini. iPad Jr. Whatever you are, just get here already.

I’ve been quietly watching from the sidelines to see what, if anything Apple is going to do with the iPad Mini.

So far, there have been (the standard) sightings of the Mini, leaked to the internet.

And oodles and oodles of speculation about what features will be baked into it.

To be honest, I can’t say that I’ve followed any of this chatter closely.

I’ve done that dance before.

Wait with bated breath, only to be let down when the <insert name of much anticipated Apple device here> actually arrives.

At this point, it’s just that I know how Apple does.

Why should the iPad Mini be any different?

We all know what the iPad mini should be.

But it’s unlikely that it will be what we expect.

I firmly believe that the iPad Mini should be a small version of the iPad.

It should be fully functional with all its current features intact.

That means, the iPad Mini should have: a forward and read-facing camera, wifi, 3G, essentially everything the current iPad 3 has.

But will Apple give us the device we expect?

Probably not.

It will most likely be like the original iPad.

You remember how disappointed you were when you opened up your iPad and realized that there was no camera.

But wait!

Here comes the iPad 2, with what?

Wait for it…

…A camera!

Bastards!

Why did do they do that to us?

Wasn’t the iPad really just a big iPhone?

Didn’t the iPhone already have 2 cameras!?

So why strip the iPad of what everyone assumed would have been a natural feature to include in the iPad?

Money, obviously.

But they’re not going to do that to the iPad Mini?

Are they?

Isn’t the whole point of the iPad Mini offering to compete with the other smaller form tablet devices in the market today?

Shouldn’t the strategy be to bake all the bells and whistles that devices like the Kindle Fire and Galaxy Note have?

Wouldn’t it be counter-intuitive to withhold features that consumers are already used to on the current iPad?

I got my son the Kindle Fire, and it really is a great device.

Now there’s the blown out HD version, which is a real step up in a number of respects for Kindle.

Higher resolution screen.

Faster processor.

More storage.

Additional ports.

4G LTE.

They blew it out!

Apple would be wise to follow suit and go H.A.M. with the iPad Mini.

H.A.M.=hard as a motherfucker for my Kanye West challenged readers.

Unfortunately, experience tells us that Apple doesn’t always do what’s best for the consumer.

So while I’m interested to see the new iPad Mini, I’ve set my expectations very low.

Do I want it?

Sure.

I’d rather have an iOS device that synchs with the rest of my Mac world, than some other device that doesn’t.

Will I be disappointed.

Sure.

History tells us that Apple is notorious for putting out products that often fall far short of user expectation.

Apple should just release the iPad Mini and put us all out of our collective misery already.

But with a constantly moving announcement date, its unlikely that we’ll see an iPad Mini in the wild anytime soon.

eBook reader-cum-tablet? A Kindle Fire get-over saga.

This summer, I got my son a Kindle Fire for his 9th birthday.

He had given us a short list of his birthday wishes.

Mind you, his list was fairly perfunctory.

Library card. Library card? Live a little kid!

New bike. Nah B! Your current bike is perfectly fine.

Kindle Fire. Hmm…I can do this.

I was impressed by my son’s third request.

His sister had requested (and received) an Amazon Kindle for her last birthday.

She really seemed to be into reading books, and I suppose, this inspired his own interest in the eReader.

Seeking to support my son’s intellectual pursuits, we hurriedly ordered the device and, beaming, presented it to him for his birthday.

But once it was in his grubby paws, I realized that we had been hoodwinked.

The desire to read electronic books (like his sister) was the furthest thing from his mind.

Even though we had admonished him to avoid ordering anything without consulting mommy or daddy first, he found a loophole – free apps.

It wasn’t really ordering if they didn’t cost anything was it?

So almost immediately, he began downloading all kinds of games, and apps and game apps.

There was nary a eBook among the email confirmations that flooded my account.

All hours of the day and night, he was either glued to the device or ordering apps like a maniac.

It was only as my son morphed into a zombie, that I first saw the Kindle Fire commercials.

As drool escaped the corners of my son’s mouth, illuminated by the glow from the device, that I realized that this little bugger had gotten completely over on us!

The signs were there, but I missed them.

I hadn’t put two and two together.

You see, he’s always asking to play Angry Birds or some other innocuous game on my iPad.

And I repeatedly say ‘no.’

His request for the Kindle Fire was an end-around to my opposition.

A thinly veiled way of getting a tablet, to play games and such, without raising any suspicion or alarm.

The Kindle was certainly NOT to read.

This experience has me re-examining this whole eBook reader phenomenon.

I used to think all eReaders were just that – readers.

First, there was the Kindle (2007).

Then the Nook (10/09).

Sony also had some skin in the game with their readers.

There were black-and-white versions, color versions, backlit versions, versions with keyboards and versions without.

And then came the iPad.

And the eReader game was forever changed.

Sure a tablet device was good for reading, but the iPad offered so much more.

Apps. The web. Light computing.

It was truly a device of the future.

Not wanting to be left out, Kindle released the Kindle Fire, with apps and internet surfing baked right in.

Of course, Barnes & Noble followed up with their Nook Tablet, which offered the same functionality.

eReaders went from simple monochrome blah to web surfing, wifi/3G connected funky, combining the connective utility of a tablet with the pure function of an eReader.

And what I initially thought was my son’s simple request to get his read on, has become a straight tablet coup!

All I know is that the lines between eReaders and tablets have been forever obscured…

And that my son is slick.

I’m sorry. I just can’t get excited about the iPad Mini.

Is this the new iPad Mini? Time will tell.

There’s quite a hullabaloo around Apple’s alleged September 12 announcement.

The buzz around the iPhone 5 and the release of iOS 6 have kept tech bloggers busy.

I have to admit, that I too, have been caught in the frenzy.

I was totally bamboozled by a colleague who posted up a link to a leaked ‘first look’ video of the iPhone…only to realize that it was a hoax.

Damn you adamthinks.com!

But as much as I’ve tried, I simply can’t muster the energy to get excited about the iPad Mini.

Yeah. The rumor mills have been throwing around theories about what the iPad Mini will ultimately be.

And there has much speculation about its potential features.

Sure. The Kindle Fire and Google Nexus 7 have left Apple in the unenviable position of NOT being first to the mini tablet space.

So the likelihood of a smaller, lower priced offering, designed to compete with these devices, is great.

But I’m still not waiting with bated breath for it.

I mean really.

The ‘new‘ iPad dropped a few months ago.

Less than six months later, they’re dropping another iPad.

And I’m supposed to be all gaga over it?

Why?

Because of the smaller form factor?

The lower price?

Will it have all the same bells and whistles of the current iPad?

Or will Apple pull an ‘iPad’ and drop a device without all the attributes you know they have the capacity to bake in – just to set up the crush for the fully loaded iPad Mini 2.

We’ve all been victims of Apple’s frequent bait-and-switch.

As much as we applaud Apple whenever a new innovative product is released.

We resent them.

When they immediately drop the new and improved whatchumacallit rendering your latest acquisition obsolete.

So you’ll pardon me if I’m over the fanfare and leaks around the iPad Mini.

If you’re really interested, I’m sure that TechCrunch, Gizmodo or Engadget are following the iPad drama unfold.

But not the kid!

Not today anyway…

If you’re really interested in the latest-and-greatest iPad Mini news, check the link to the latest iPad mini photographs from the Daily Mail.

Apple 1 (billion). Samsung 0.

Samsung is cute and all, but original…not so much.

Yesterday, it was announced that the jury in the Apple patent lawsuit against Samsung had returned a verdit in Apple’s favor on virtually every count of their complaint.

The jury determined that Samsung had, in fact, ripped off Apple’s designs for the popular iPhone and iPad devices.

Despite a spirited defense, and counter complaints against Apple, alleging that Apple had infringed upon several of Samsung’s patents, the jury soundly rejected Samsung’s arguments and found in Apple’s favor.

The jury found that several of Samsung’s products illegally used Apple’s patented “bounce-back” feature when a user scrolls to an end image, and the ability to zoom text with a tap of a finger.

In so finding, they awarded Apple $1.05 billion, about $1.5 shy of what Apple was suing for, but a marked more than Samsung expected to pay.

Apple’s lawyers, seeing blood with the jury verdict, are now asking the judge to levy treble damages (triple the amount of the actual damages awarded a prevailing plaintiff, leveled to punish the losing party for willful conduct).

Of course, lawyers for Samsung immediately filed an appeal, seeking to reverse the jury verdict and challenge the damages awarded.

It’s unlikely that they’ll be successful.

But the bigger issue are the implications for the rest of the mobile phone industry.

Samsung isn’t the only mobile phone maker to use Apple’s bounce-back or zoom features.

A full range of Android devices are likely going to be in Apple’s crosshairs soon enough.

Samsung was one of the first companies to leverage Google’s Android platform on it’s devices, but it is far from the only one.

Motorola, HTC, and LG are all handset makers utilizing the Android operating system in their phones, but Samsung was by far the leader, with over 20 million Android smart phones sold since their introduction in 2010.

The real impact of this verdit will be seen in the coming months, as manufacturers determine whether sticking with Android will expose them to the type of liability Samsung has been exposed to.

If anything, this verdict re-establishes Apple claim to innovation.